Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Cats! The Musical

How am I ever going to have children?

I mean, really.

It's these exasperating cats again. Max is in heat. We've had her for a week and a half and she's in heat. I'm pretty sure I read in the kitty owner's manual that it is horribly unfair for cats to do this so quickly after you rescue them and they will never put you through it. Of course, I am joking and wishing I wasn't because 1) I could definitely use a kitty owner's manual right now and 2) I would love for it to say that.

So Max has been wandering the house howling and rubbing against everything. Did I mention howling? Yeah. A whole lot of howling. Loud howling. Howling that sounds like foreign children crying and gurgling and calling for their mothers. I like to pretend she's a (terrible) opera singer practicing for a performance.

It's silly. She's calling for a male cat to come mate with her. Doesn't she know how bad kitty sex hurts? I don't think she'd be calling nearly so desperately if she knew.

So anyways, as I'm trying to calm Max down, Charlee takes every opportunity to jump onto tables that she's not supposed to and pee on things that she's not supposed to.

I feel like the mother of two-year-old twins.

I do not know how people do this.

But at least we're taking Max to the vet to be spayed soon and Charlee to the vet to find out what's up with the Urine Crisis of 2010. God.

So, happy things for today? I cut my hair. It's finally the style I was trying to achieve about six haircuts ago. I wish I hadn't virtually shaved my head in order to "fix" the series of failed haircuts back in November, but whatever. Live and learn. And then put down the scissors.

Other happy things?

25) achievements in medicine
26) good things happening to good people
27) looking outside of yourself
28) hearing the exact words you've needed to hear for years
29) tetris
30) afternoon naps

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